Behind Blue Eyes
by ramen-is-my-goddess
Summary: There is no summary for this. seriously. i don't even think you should bother reading it...rated T for cursing and 'disturbing' content. put under Sora and Roxas because it somewhat centers around them. "what's it like to be insane?"


**I just KNOW I'm going to regret uploading this garbage (scowls) I hope you're happy Ems...because I'm doing this for YOU.**

**Anyways, this is a lengthy oneshot I wrote last year (damn...has it really been THAT long? o.O). If you enjoy this, you're a sick f-ck who needs more help than I do.**

**WARNING: I wrote this between the hours of 3 a.m. and 6 a.m. after staying up all night watching Gothika, which, if you've never seen, DON'T! That movie was incredibly pointless (to me at least) and was just all over the place with no real plot that I could find...except that little line of "it's like playing God..." which is just as creepy as it sounds. And as I watched the credits, I noticed the song that was playing for the first time, and realized how well it fit with the idea of being locked up in an asylum, whether wrongfully or otherwise. So what did I do? I wrote a f-cking oneshot with KH characters based on the feeling all that left me with. (and yes, it's just as pointless as the movie, and no, there's no plot. not even an attempt at one, so don't ASK)**

**Disclaimer: don't own KH, the characters, the song Behind Blue Eyes (Limp Bizkit's cover, yo) or the...ahem, 'movie' that inspired me to write it.**

* * *

_Euphoria_.

It pumped through his veins, his blood boiling in his skin, so much like the creature that consumed the structure before his very eyes. He couldn't look away. Such beauty created by such destruction. Such _power_.

_Heat._

It scorched his face, peeling away the mask he could never seem to remove with anything else. The only thing he could feel anymore. He was forever fated to be cold, to be unfeeling…until that incomparable sensation swept over his body.

_Colors._

They danced, sang. Composed a score insurmountable by even the almighty Beethoven himself. No concerto by Mozart, Chopin, or Bach could ever compare. It flickered and sighed. It _breathed_. It _lived_. Feeding and disposing, just like any other beast inhabiting this wretched planet.

Closing his eyes, he opened his arms and embraced the unbearable warmth that brought such comfort to one such as him. Never in the arms of another could he find that same consolation. Unlike humanity, his obsession was ever changing, ever shifting. Never entirely predictable and always, _always_ dangerous.

_What a rush…_

**xXxXx**

Footsteps echoed down the wide corridor. Every little cough, every brush of clothing, every _breath_ was accentuated. Or maybe every sense simply went on the alert the second that heavy door closed behind you, the haunting sound of every lock turning as they passed through causing each of them to tense the slightest bit more, until it felt as if their bodies would simply snap under the pressure.

"This way gentleman." The woman in white who led their sullen group uttered, waving her arm in a gesture that encompassed yet another brightly lit corridor. For such a well lit place, it certainly felt dark. The young man between the two towering bodies flanking each side of his smaller frame fought off a chill, unsure whether it was because of the lack of heat this entire building seemed to posses or the grim faces that stared at them. The empty eyes that tracked every movement with the cold, oppressive precision of a predator on the hunt.

The four of them continued down the hall, through another large set of doors, reinforced with steel. On the other side were, predictably, another set of guards. Their heads bowed, faces averted. Their bright blue, rent-a-cop uniforms would have been comical…if not for the utter seriousness stamped on their features that showed no expression except an inherent hardness meant to intimidate without words.

And boy, did it work.

They passed the guards with a nod, the young man between his own, personal guards keeping his head down, blue eyes trained on the tips of his casual white sneakers. He'd done his best to dress as normally as possible, and now felt underdressed and out of place. Then again, anyone would feel out of place here. After checking their ID tags, the guards opened the fenced door that led them into the final corridor they were to travel. Following closely on the heels of the white clad nurse, the three men looked up simultaneously, admiring the sheer size of the hall. Of the need for such a large building to serve such a purpose.

Weaving their way through one set of gates, then another, through one more station of guards, and they finally arrived to their destination. The nurse bowed her head as she slid open a chain-linked gate and the three hesitated before striding through. Predictably, they all jumped slightly when the gate was slid shut and locked behind them. Two more guards positioned themselves by the gate, watching the halls and the fenced in room intently. Yet another guard stood in the far corner, behind the form slumped over the table.

Biting down on his lower lip, the young man turned to regard the uniformed men at his sides. After garnering a nod from each of them, he let out the breath he hadn't been aware had been held and sat slowly, carefully, in the cold metal chair opposite the shadowed figure. Setting his papers down in front of him, he cleared his throat and held out a hand across the table.

"Hello. I'm Sora Oharu."

The form remained silent. Face shadowed by faded blond bangs, the patient continued to stare down at either his own lap or the table top, Sora wasn't too sure. He shifted uncomfortably for a moment before dropping his hand. Fine, he could keep it strictly business.

"I'm sure the nurse informed you why we're here." Sora paused to turn and introduce the two men looming behind him protectively. "These are my colleagues, Cloud Strife,"-he indicated the somber blond standing to his right, hair standing almost on end, blue eyes ever shifting, ever observant- "and Leon Leonhart."-this time, Sora nodded over towards his left, towards a stocky brunet, eyes as grey-blue as a storming sky paired with a scar that ran down his forehead reflecting strength and secrecy- "We're from the local precinct."

There was no response, just like before, and Sora began to feel like this was a futile trip.

"Well…I'm a profiler. Psychological profiler that is. I examine the crimes someone has done and I try to create a deeper insight into what kind of a person could commit such a crime. It helps great detectives, like those behind me, to go out and catch the suspect before too much damage can be done."

A strangled laugh was his reply and Sora sat back, confused. The guard standing behind the patient pulled out his baton and gave the patient a hearty smack on the back. Hissing, the boy fell into silence once more.

"That really wasn't necessary, sir." Sora objected, giving the guard a hard look that the man simply scoffed at. As much as he hated to admit it, he and his fellow cops had little, if no, jurisdiction here. After all, they weren't trained to handle criminals _after_ they'd been sentenced and incarcerated.

When several more minutes of questioning earned them nothing but tense quiet from the patient, the three decided to call it a day. However, as he stood to leave, Sora was caught in place by the look the patient sent him. It was the first time that he'd raised his head in the entire twenty minutes or so that they'd been present. Those shadowed eyes held more intelligence, more insight than any other he'd ever come across in his entire twenty-five years of living. They seemed to see straight through him, and into a dark, previously unknown part of himself that Sora would prefer not to have to acknowledge.

"Let's go, Sora," Leon ordered quietly, taking a firm hold of Sora's arm and beginning to lead the brunet away from the table.

"I just have one more question," Sora begged, "Please," he gave the two officers a pointed look. "Just one more, private, question."

The officers stiffly nodded after a moment and left the caged room, the stubborn guard refusing to leave his post in the darkest corner. After a tense stare down, the man finally left with a huff to wait outside the gate with the others. Sora inhaled shakily, casting a wary eye over towards the still silent patient sitting across the gleaming metal table, piercing eyes still boring into his very soul.

"What is it like…being insane?"

Cocking his head to the side, the patient eyed Sora slowly from head to toe. Though the lower half of his legs was hidden by the table, he still seemed to see. Nothing, not even a solid object, could hide him from those eyes.

Unnerved once again by the silence, and no longer having the strength of his two friends behind him, Sora took another steadying breath and quickly ran through all the information on this boy in his head. Roxas Yutsuko. Twenty years old. A patient of the Greenwood Asylum for the Criminally Insane since he was admitted five years ago after murdering his mother and father. Considered to be dangerously unstable. Diagnosed with insanity and psychopathic tendencies by three separate doctors. And yet, the actual definition of true insanity was doing something over and over again, expecting different results each time. For some reason, Sora didn't get that feeling from Roxas.

No, sitting before him was an intellectual, someone who was aware of what they did…and the inevitable consequences that came with his actions.

Perhaps that was why he was put down as _psychopathic._

Dark pools of blue that made Sora shudder from their familiarity to his own seemed to dull, losing their piercing intensity from before. Stretching his arms out along the table, the long sleeves of his canvas jacket trailing with the movement, Roxas slowly lowered his head and titled it almost completely horizontal, lending him an almost owlish quality.

"It's like being nothing," he whispered so softly, Sora had to lean across the table himself, closing the gap between them in order to hear. "Nothing and everything," His voice had lowered with each word, making Sora lean in closer still. By now, the brunet could feel the gentle steam of air coming from Roxas' lips as he spoke, "You don't think…you don't feel…you just…are."

Swallowing hard, Sora found himself asking the question that had been plaguing him ever since being assigned this case.

"Do you know why you're here?" He murmured.

Roxas' eyes flared at that. "Yes."

"Why?"

"I killed my mother…and my father. Took a knife and cut them from ear, to ear," He demonstrated with a finger, pulling his long sleeve up to his elbow and dragging the spidery appendage from one corner of his jaw, around his throat and back up to the opposite side. "Made a beautiful necklace for mother…she always did look good in red." Roxas chuckled darkly at his own words, the sound holding no mirth.

Though the tone of his voice, the look on his face, signaled danger ahead if this line of questioning continued, Sora still pressed.

"Why'd you kill them? I mean, they were your _parents_."

Eyes narrowing, Roxas practically crawled up onto the table, his face only millimeters from Sora's. "Why? You want to know _why_?"

"There had to be a reason."

"You want a reason?" Roxas' lip curled. "I hated them."

"Why?"

"Why? _Why_?!" Roxas fell back into his chair, hands fisting in his hair and yanking out the straw colored locks. "WHY?!"

Sora was beginning to get unsettled enough to turn and call for the guards and his friends to return, when Roxas launched himself across the table to grab onto Sora's throat, dragging the brunet face to face with him again.

"I was _sick_ of him _fucking_ me! I was _sick_ of her doing _nothing_!" he shrieked, his grip tightening, cutting off the intake of air. "_That_ good enough for your reason?!_ Hmm_?!"

The guards had flooded back in, pulling Roxas off of Sora and throwing the screaming blond to the floor. Coughing and gagging as air rushed back into his lungs, Sora stumbled backwards into the steadying arms of Cloud and Leon, both staring down at him worriedly.

"Are you alright, Sora? Did he hurt you?" Leon asked, lifting Sora's chin to inspect the purple bruises already marring the tanned skin of his neck. Cloud glared down at the tangle of bodies as the guards held Roxas down on the floor, two holding an arm each while the third sat on Roxas' chest, pulling out a syringe and plunging the needle into the boy's neck.

Sora quickly hid his face in Leon's chest, never really having a strong stomach when it came to needles and the like. Strange, since in his chosen profession he saw crime scenes and blood, saw the pictures of what people do to each other. It never bothered him to see death. It saddened him, yes, but it never made him sick. Not in quite the same way as needles did.

Roxas' screams died down slowly into hoarse groans, fading away into quiet whimpers that made him sound so childlike and vulnerable. Finally, the guards released him. Two heaved the limp blond off the floor and dragged his unconscious body out of the caged interrogation room and down the hall by his arms to only god knew where, while the third guard showed him, Leon and Cloud the way out.

"You sure you're alright?" this time, it was Cloud who inquired as they stepped out the main doors into the dim sunshine of the late afternoon, which was odd, since Cloud hardly ever said anything to anyone, let alone expressed concern for anyone except himself. Sora knew deep down, the blond police officer was a good guy. But as a homicide detective, you had to have a hard, unfeeling outer shell. Dealing with the horrible things people did to others, you had to be like that, or else you'd be driven mad by guilt and pity.

Sora nodded, wincing as he swallowed. One hand gently rubbed against his throat as he recalled the cold hands that had squeezed it so easily. Roxas was so small; seemed so harmless…it was amazing what power one such as him could have.

Cloud sighed irritably, leading them down the stairs and to their waiting patrol car. He held open the back door for Sora to slide into the backseat before taking his usual place in the passenger side as Leon started the engine. As they pulled away, Sora couldn't help but turn to watch as the gigantic, stone structure shrank as they drove further and further from it. All the windows were barred, and there were few, most being on the first two floors. The top two floors were bare of windows, and from personally being inside its confining walls, Sora knew that those top two floors were nothing but holding cells. How could their world come to need such a place?

What was it that truly drove a man insane?

**xXxXx**

"It seems our phantom arsonist has struck again, sir,"

That was the utterly depressing greeting they received upon arriving back at the station. Leon sighed and rubbed at his face tiredly, taking the file from the deputy and continuing on his way to his office. Cloud followed without a word, and Sora wandered off to his own desk. As he sat heavily in his chair, he blankly noted the blinking light on his phone, signaling a voice message. He knew who it would be. Could already hear that voice, those same words left in every message he ever received.

"_Sora, just come home already. You promised you'd quit last month. You aren't cut out for that job, it's killing you."_

But he couldn't bring himself to leave. Even so young, Sora was the best profiler the precinct had. And with a case as big as this phantom arsonist, he couldn't just back out and throw in the towel, not when his friends, his community, needed him most. He'd go home later tonight, or early in the morning, sneak into his apartment, sleep for probably twenty minutes before his alarm went off, made yet another false promise to leave the precinct, then come here to sit at this desk. Filing report after report, pouring over picture after picture, statement after statement, going over statistic after statistic. Possibly coming up with a lead, and then that fated message that never changed. Sure, some days the words were different, but the meaning was always the same.

Lather, rinse, repeat. This was his life. It was always the same. Like clockwork.

At least, it had been until today.

Against better judgment, Sora pressed the blinking button, lifting the receiver to his ear and inputting his four-digit code to get into his voice mail. He was pleasantly surprised, if a bit off-put, to hear that it was the head nurse from Greenwood, expressing her concerns for his health. Probably didn't want to get sued. Heh. Oh what a world…

"_Mr. Oharu, after today's…incident, you must think me, well, crazy for lack of a better word to ask you to make a return visit, but I'm afraid for Roxas. We've been keeping him under sedation, but whenever he comes to, he keeps screaming your name. Would it be too much trouble for you to come down here later tonight? The sooner, the better, I can be reached at…"_

Sora zoned out as she rambled off the number for the asylum. Had he really gotten to the blond? Though he was afraid of what his decision might entail for him, Sora nonetheless checked to be sure that no one was around to overhear before quickly dialing the number he'd managed to write down in his daze.

When the voice from the message answered, Sora confirmed his return visit. Whatever was wrong, it obviously was serious enough to entitle a call. Besides, Sora just didn't have it in him, as both a person and a psychologist, to simply toss aside the chance to help someone.

And so, when he was sure that Leon and Cloud were occupied, Sora gathered his things and left the station, locating his car in the dreary, cloudy night and beginning the long drive out of the city and into the hills, the road winding and almost dizzying in its smooth curves, first twisting one way and then the other. Over and over, forever and ever.

Then suddenly, there were the gates of Greenwood, looming above. They opened, however, as his car approached. He'd been told that he was expected, so Sora thought nothing of the automatic entrance. He wound his way up the long drive, finally coming to a stop and finding a parking place in the near empty lot. Jumping out of his vehicle, Sora all but sprinted up the stairs to the main doors. He let himself in and quickly made his way to the front desk.

"I'm sorry, sir, but visiting hours are over." The woman behind the desk informed him. Sora blinked at her before flashing his ID and telling her of the message he received. The head nurse was called down and she met Sora in the foyer, taking him back down the same winding corridors and maze of doors as earlier that afternoon.

"Thank you for coming. I would have understood if you said no." she said conversationally, if a bit anxiously, as they passed by the caged rooms and up a flight of stairs. This was new. Sora gulped nervously as they made their way down the narrow hall, leaning heavily against the far railing, as far as he could from the darkened rooms on the other side.

Sora shook his head. "It's alright. I had nothing else to keep me busy, and if I can help, how could I say no?" he laughed nervously, trying to shake off his tension.

The nurse nodded her head humbly. Both of them tensed visibly as they approached a cell at the end of the block. From behind the solid metal door came weak, yet still carrying cries. She paused at the door, moving aside so Sora could peer through the small window into the cell. It was narrow and claustrophobic looking, with nothing but a bed jutting out from the far wall. The sheets were torn and littered the floor, the small form of what he could only assume was Roxas sat curled in the middle of the cot, rocking slowly back and forth, chanting, "Sora, Sora, Sora…"

"Should I…go in?"

The nurse held up a hand and pulled out a syringe from her pouch like pocket, waving him aside so she could slowly unlock and open the door. Once it was open, she carefully slipped through the small opening. Sora watched as it closed with quiet click, shifting from foot to foot as he waited. Finally, after what seemed a lifetime, the nurse reemerged with a small, strained smile, holding the door open wider for Sora to join her inside.

Roxas was slumped against the wall, eyes glazed over slightly, head lolling loosely on his neck. His fingers kept twitching spasmodically, mewling sounds coming from his parted lips.

Sora tentatively sat on the edge of the bed next to the limp body. "Roxas?"

"Soooraaaahhh," Roxas sang, his head rolling over so those hazy eyes could stare at him. "Hello, Sora Oharu. I'm Roxas Yutsuko."

"Um…hi, Roxas. Is there something you wanted to talk to me about? Is that why you kept calling for me?" Whatever it was that was bothering Roxas, Sora was making it his sole duty to figure it out. He was determined to help this boy where everyone else seemed to have given up hope on him. From that first moment their eyes met in that interrogation room, Sora felt like he'd known Roxas his entire life. Whenever he looked into those eyes, he saw a reflection of himself. Like a darker half. An insight into what he could possibly become if he lost himself.

"Yessss," he hissed, turning a disgruntled glare at the nurse. "Stupid bitch…drugged meeee…" his words were slurred, but understandable, and his face turned once more to Sora. "I know why you came to see me."

"You do? Didn't they—''

"They didn't tell me _shit_," Roxas interrupted, his voice becoming stronger, his words clearer. "They never do. No…I knew the minute I saw you…you're looking for him."

"For who?" Now he was intrigued.

Roxas leaned forward, and out of instinct, Sora leaned back, suddenly remembering the same routine from before. "The man in my dreams."

"And what man is that?" Sora asked carefully, eyeing Roxas closely.

Grunting in frustration, Roxas yanked on his hair again. "God, aren't you listening? The man in my _dreams_. The fire man!"

Sora's eyes widened. Was Roxas talking about the arsonist he and his fellow officers were chasing?

"I see him…not every night…but almost that often…" Roxas turned his eyes to the ceiling, a look of pure euphoria crossing his features. "He never sees me watching…oh, but I see him…he lights those fires…just to see it. He watched buildings and people crumble into ashes…and he _lives_ for it. Just to _see_ it, to _feel_ it…" blue eyes rolled back in his head as Roxas continued to ramble about fire and the mystery man. Sora, while disturbed, felt hope rising. Roxas may be certifiably insane, but perhaps through him, they could get a solid lead on this guy. Predict his next target before he struck, get a physical description, something. Anything.

"Do you ever see what he looks like, Roxas?" Sora asked eagerly, reaching out to gently brush a hand over the blond's shoulder.

Roxas jerked out of whatever trance he'd been in, blinking rapidly as he looked around the room. "Why are you here? I'm trying to sleep." He pouted petulantly before spotting Sora. "Oh…you…what do you want from me _now_?"

Sora, confused, stared Roxas down as the blond glared at him. It was as if…Roxas didn't recall their previous conversation at all.

"What did you inject him with?"

The nurse shrugged. "A common sedative. These aren't the usual side-effects. He always remembers…not matter what."

After several futile minutes of questioning, which only served to irritate Roxas, Sora left. The nurse thanked him for coming and Sora returned to his car, driving back down the hill and into the city without incident. Even after getting home, Sora still couldn't get over his excitement. Roxas could very well be the key to finding their phantom arsonist.

**xXxXx**

"You did _what_?!"

Sora winced at Leon's tone. Chewing on his bottom lip, the young brunet shrugged innocently. "I went to the asylum last night."

"_Alone_?!"

Another wince. "Um…yes?"

"Damn it, Sora, that was stupid of you! You should have said something to one of us!" he indicated where Cloud sat, frowning disapprovingly on the other side of Leon's office.

"But…the nurse said that Roxas—''

"I don't care what the nurse said, Sora, you still shouldn't have gone alone. It's dangerous up there."

"Yes, but I got a lead from Roxas on our arsonist!" Sora shouted as Leon began to lecture him some more. Both older men sat forward, eyebrows raised in both curiosity and disbelief.

"Oh really?" Leon said doubtfully.

Sora stuck his tongue out childishly. "Yes, _really_. While I was there, he starting talking about a man. A man he saw in his dreams who lights fires for the sheer enjoyment!"

Cloud rolled his eyes and looked away as Leon shook his head. "Sora…" he began, rubbing his temples. "The kid is a nutcase. Completely and utterly insane. He probably just wants attention, and you're giving it to him!"

"Please, Leon, just listen! Just let me talk to Roxas, I promise he can help us. Please!"

"For god's sake, Sora, he tried to _kill_ you!"

"Only because I pressed him about his past!" Sora defended. "He's not a bad person, he just grew up in the wrong environment and it got to him!"

"That's enough!" Leon slammed a fist on his desk, stunning Sora into silence. "I don't want to hear another word of this, is that understood? And if I find out that you're sneaking up there to get in late night visits again, you'll be off this case and out of the job. Are we clear?"

Keeping his head down, Sora nodded. "Yes, sir," he muttered sullenly.

Sora left Leon's office silently. He went to his own desk. He didn't even need to sit and think, he just grabbed his files and notes, his coat and his keys and left. Without even glancing back, knowing that he wasn't clever enough to get away with it, Sora made his way calmly to his car and drove up to Greenwood.

The head nurse greeted him at the desk, and he asked to see Roxas. It took some serious convincing, but after the favor Sora had done for them last night, she couldn't really refuse him for long. And so, down into the labyrinth like building they went, twisting and turning down passageways, going through doors and security checks, finally arriving at the caged rooms once more.

Sora wasn't sure if it was a good or bad thing that he was more at ease here alone now. He waited patiently, going through his case notes and thinking of all the questions he wanted to ask.

When a guard finally led a rather smug looking Roxas into the room, Sora stood and held out a hand, though he knew from past experience that Roxas wouldn't take it. The blond simply stared at him before he was roughly shoved into his chair. Roxas threw the guard's hands off him and glared before dismissing the man.

"What do you want?" he demanded without preamble.

"Hello to you as well, Roxas." Sora replied, opening the file and pulling out several pictures of the remains of the seven buildings, and the people inside them, that the arsonist had destroyed. "I wanted to ask you for help on the case I'm currently working on. I'm afraid that we never got to that part of our meeting yesterday." He leaned in slightly and whispered, "By the way, I'm sorry about pressing you…you know, about the past…what's done is done, and it should stay that way."

Roxas laughed rather cynically at that. His eyes flickered over the pictures, different emotions flashing through them, but the blond's composure remained the same. Quiet, calculating and still with that smug air about him. "I remember these places…"

"You've been here?" Sora pointed at the photos.

"In my dreams…" again, Roxas looked towards the ceiling, eyes rolling up back into his head. "He saw them...watched them fall apart…"

That same excitement from before began to fill Sora and he sat forward again. "So you saw these places before he—''

"What are you doing here?"

Sora jerked back at the sudden question, staring confusedly as Roxas glared at him. The blond looked down at the pictures and thrust them away, crossing his arms in a huff.

"I thought I made it clear that I don't like you…"

_It's almost like he has a split personality…one experiences and recalls the dreams, coming across as smug and confident, while the other recalls nothing but the past and is angry and bitter…_

"Yes…you did…" Sora acknowledged. "I was hoping I could make amends for sticking my nose some place it didn't belong."

Roxas' eyes narrowed as he gently laid his head down on the table. "It wouldn't have mattered, you know…"

"What wouldn't have mattered?" Sora inquired quietly as he gathered his papers, sliding them back into the folder.

"If I'd been sane when they brought me here." He snorted. "Hell, it wouldn't matter if I were sane now."

Cocking his head curiously, Sora found that he had to ask. "Oh?"

That smug grin slid itself back onto Roxas' face, giving him a lazy, cocky aura. "Yeeaaahhh," he drew the word out, like a long, satisfying stretch in the morning right after you wake up. "Once you're in here…you're _crazy_," he whispered the last word. "And the more you try to tell them the truth, the crazier you are."

"Are you telling me that you aren't crazy?"

Another one of those cynical laughs. "What's the point of answering that? It wouldn't matter, now would it?"

Sighing, Sora collected his things and made to stand. Roxas' hand shot out and clamped down hard on his arm. Sora cried out at the contact, feeling like the bones in his arm were being ground into powder by that one small, thin hand.

"He wants to burn, Sora…you won't catch him until he burns…" Roxas whispered harshly, gripping the brunet's arm harder. "Do you understand? He wants to _burn_, Sora. And you won't catch him until he burns."

Face scrunched in pain, Sora panted as Roxas' hold tightened, if that was even possible. "W-what do you mean?"

"He wants to burn." There went the eyes, the white exposed as they rolled up, his eyelids flickering. The guards noticed Roxas' hold on Sora and were frantically trying to open the gate, shouting for sedatives. "He destroys houses…buildings…people…he burns _me_, in my dreams…but his one desire is to burn himself…to be one with his obsession…it calls to him…he doesn't sleep, just lights the fire, watches as it grows, as it feeds." Suddenly, those eyes were right in front of him, and Sora couldn't help but scream as the midnight blue turned to ice. "He watches as it _burns_, Sora!"

Finally the guards got the gate open and at least a dozen of them flooded inside, but it was for nothing. Roxas had passed out on the table, releasing Sora who stumbled back, rubbing feeling back into his arm.

"I-is he alright?" Sora called shakily as the head nurse came to escort him out. He wanted to object and stay, just to be sure that Roxas was alright, but he knew that he'd overstayed his welcome, knew that he was in enough trouble as it was. He'd risked everything, his job, his very life, to come here, and he was walking away with nothing.

Nothing except the premonition of a certified twenty year old.

"Leon's gonna kill me…"

**xXxXx**

"Clean out your desk. You're fired."

"Yes, sir."

Sora turned to leave the office, casting one last, long look at Leon, who'd turned his back to stare out the window into the crowded streets below. He knew it was hopeless trying to reason with Leon now. He also knew that Leon was only trying to keep him safe. With a sigh, Sora finally left the office, making his way slowly to his desk. He swept paper stack after paper stack into an empty Xerox box. There went some pens, a few pictures, more papers…

"So, did you get anything?"

Sora whirled around to see Cloud standing behind him. The blond raised an eyebrow in question, choosing to not repeat himself when he knew he'd been heard clearly.

"U-um…no…not really…" Sora answered as he finished clearing off his desk and setting the box on the gleaming, if somewhat tarnished, wood. "Just that the arsonist is, indeed, male…and he does what he does for the sheer enjoyment of it all…oh, and that he'll burn himself to death before we catch him." With those words hanging between them, Sora lifted the box into his arms and gave Cloud a sad smile. "Was fun while it lasted, eh, Cloudy?" the brunet turned and walked out of the building, leaving behind nothing but the regret that he failed to bring this one to justice.

The rest of his day, Sora spent in his empty apartment. Sure there was furniture, even if it was sparse. Sure, there were little personal items that made the small studio home. But it was empty. Even with Sora himself sitting there on the couch, staring at the file he'd taken without permission, the place was completely empty. Just as he was.

Brushing his fingertips across the pictures of the scorched remains, Sora couldn't help but think about Roxas. Why was it that Roxas seemed to be so connected with this phantom arsonist? Why did the blond dream about the mysterious man when the two of them had absolutely nothing in common?

It seemed that Sora was about to learn that some things, just couldn't be explained.

**xXxXx**

Finally, what he'd been waiting for. The time was right. He'd had his fun, lived his life. He could no longer contain himself. It was time to become one with his destiny.

He didn't need any kerosene to help. No gasoline or alcohol. No lighter fluid. No, the fire knew he was ready, and it would act accordingly.

With a simple snap of his fingers, the match was struck, the flare of flame settled into a gently swaying flicker. He was transfixed as he watched it hungrily eat up the small feast of wood laid at its feet, like a sacrifice.

Before it could snuff out, he dropped the match into his lap, laying his head back as his clothes were lit. Finally, the burn on the outside was matched to the flames dancing in his blood. The cold was gone, and he knew as the colors grew, as his body slowly melted away, that it was gone for good.

**xXxXx**

Sora grumbled to himself as he groped around for his humming phone under the blankets. It'd been a week since he'd been fired. Two days since he'd seen Roxas. And the arsonist had yet to be caught. But Roxas had been acting strangely the last time they'd talked. The blond had been…nicer to Sora for once. Calmer. As if he knew something was about to happen. Sora was eager to know what, but whenever he'd tried to talk to Roxas about it, the blond would snap back into his bitter personality and change the subject.

Finally locating the communication device, Sora sat up and yawned a sleepy, "Hello?"

"Sora? Hey, sorry to wake you so early."

"Leon?" Sora yawned again as he looked at his clock. It was only just now breaking seven a.m.

"Yeah, I just thought you'd like to know that we finally got our guy."

"Our guy?"

"The arsonist. Neighbors reported smoke coming from a nearby trailer. Firefighters got to it in time to save most of the interior. They found the remains of a man on the floor and pictures of the places burned on the walls. Along with a hell of a lot of fireworks, homemade bombs, kerosene, matchbooks and lighters. It was definitely our guy."

Something was nagging at the back of Sora's head as he heard the news. "Oh…well, okay then."

"I just thought I'd let you know that this case is pretty much closed now, so you can stop worrying yourself over it."

"Hey Leon?"

"Yeah?"

"Was there anything else there?" why he felt compelled to ask, Sora couldn't tell.

There was a muffled conversation in the back round before Cloud's voice came on. "Sora? I didn't want to say this with Leon around, but there was a note found near the body. I'm amazed it didn't burn. It says, 'we're burning together now'. Does that make any sense to you at all?"

"None whatsoever." Sora answered, perplexed. And what the hell was picking at the back of his brain?

"Well, you were right…about everything. He burned before we could catch him."

Grinning, Sora replied, "Oh, it wasn't me…it was Roxas who—_Roxas_!" Sora threw the phone away and quickly dressed, running out the door and to his car. He sped all the way to Greenwood, something urging him to go faster, to hurry, while another, smaller part of him was telling him that he was too late. For what, he didn't know. But being too late for anything was never good.

He barely took the time to stop the car, all but throwing himself at the stairs. Sora didn't wait for to okay to go through. He'd long since memorized the way to Roxas' cell in the week he'd been visiting.

As he climbed up the stairs and started down the cell block, he could hear several voices calling out for medical assistance. Sora felt like his heart stopped beating as he ran the rest of the way down to the group of staff huddled around the door of Roxas' cell. Sora pushed his was through to see the blackened, charred remains of…

Covering his mouth, Sora pushed his way into the cell and knelt next to what was left of the boy he'd come to see as he other half. And in such a short time to have known and lost him…

"Roxas…" Sora gently brushed his fingers against the side of what used to be a face, his fingertips coming away stained grayish black. The stench of burning flesh was still pungent in the room, but Sora didn't care. He lifted the withered carcass, feeling a single tear slid down his cheek as the body slowly crumbled into a pile of ashes in his hands.

"He just started screaming…" the head nurse began, kneeling next to Sora with a handkerchief pressed against her nose and mouth. "We tried to get to him, but he barricaded the door…almost as if he didn't _want_ help." She inhaled shallowly, her face stricken, but Sora noted that not a single tear had fallen. "Nothing else in the room is even singed…it's almost as if…only Roxas burned."

The nurse turned and left, while Sora remained kneeling on the floor, what was left of a life gone wrong seeping into his skin, his clothes. "You knew…" he whispered at his grey hands. "You knew this would happen…you knew that they couldn't save you…" Sora rubbed his hands together, the grey ashes all but disappearing into his skin, becoming a part of him.

And as the brunet stood and made his way slowly, dazedly, out of the Greenwood Asylum for the Criminally Insane, he strangely felt, for the first time, whole.

* * *


End file.
